Sep 12, 2011

Lizzie McGuire

It really doesn’t matter if you were a 90’s kid or not, if you don’t live under a rock you know who Lizzie, Miranda, and Gordo are. Yes. Oh yes, the Holy Trinity and crown jewels of Disney Channel as far as I’m concerned. However, if your heart is black and you have no sense of the classics, lemme give you a little run-down in Lizzie McGuire.

A. Lizzie, B. Miranda, C. Gordo, are three pre-teen friends going through the motions between quirky segue music and stock footage of their middle school. Basically there’s a problem and it’s dealt with through a series of intricate and usually unsuccessful steps before the big group hug where we all walk away with a lesson learned. It's pretty dreamy stuff. This is a world where Ethan “Nice Hair” Craft is a mega hunk, we totally hate Kate Sanders, and you get your own inner voice in the form of a cartoon caricature.

Lizzie and Miranda are best friends, they’ve got the matching complex hair-do’s to prove it. (Ridiculous barrettes included.) While both of their style’s pretty much scream teeny bopper of the early 2000’s, it’s really easy to decipher the two apart as far as clothing goes.

Miss McGuire is a girl’s girl. Floral tops, denim jackets, and pastels all around not to mention enough headbands to impress a Gossip Girl. Except for that one time she went sorta early-Avril Lavigne on us…

Then there’s Miranda Sanchez who is basically wicked cool with graphic tees galore and mixing prints. Also the little known pioneer of the fake clip-in dyed hair.

As in all true sitcoms, there’s the nerd who’s in love with his best friend whilst sporting the plain shirt under the surreal collared button-up. We call him Gordo. But, shh, that’s not supposed to be resolved until Lizzie McGuire the Movie!

Lizzie McGuire is lovely not only in all of it's familiarity and nostalgia, but it's surprisingly aesthetically pleasing and just plain ol' fun. Not to mention the moralistic value.

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